FUNNY SMS
• Doctor to Lady: U r looking so weak and exhausted ! Are U properly taking 3 meals a day as I had advised ?
Lady: Oh my God ! I heard 3 Males per day !
• Doctor, cut off my dog’s tail.
Vet: Why do u want to do that?
Coz my mom-in-law is visiting us & I don’t want anything to make her think she’s welcomed.
• Most of my friends are normal, sane, cultured, decent, intellectual & well-behaved persons… Just wanna thank you for breaking the monotony!
• Police arrestd a drunkard & askd: Where r u goin?
Man: I’m goin 2 listen lecture on ill effcts of drinking.
Cop: Who’ll lecture at midnite?
Man: My wife…
• Grammar Teacher: Rahul sharaab Nahin Peeta Hai. Is sentence mein Rahul kya hai?
Pappu: Madam! Rahul chutiya hai…
• Valentine special: Dunyia wich reh k rangaa wich kho jao.. Kise nu apna bana lao ya kise da ho jao.. Je kuchh vi ni hunda taan….Chakko Rajaai te so jao.
• I Love You is 8 letters long. Then again, so is bullshit.
• Q: Which type of Women wear Revealing Clothes?
A: Those who don’t have Confidence in the Imaginative powers of Men!
• Law Professor: Which is the most important LAW of Finance for Starting a New Business?
Student: Father-in-Law!
• Agar aap chahte hain k apke face pe dhool-mitii na lage to Roz subah lagaiye Asian Paints ka Apex Ultima jo dhool-mitti ko tikne na de!
• What’s the biggest pressure for Pak captain when Pak needs 1 run to win in 8 ovrs, with 5 wickets in hand?
Ya Allah! How to speak English in presentation ceremony?
• Alcohol contain female hormones. Proof: Men gain weight, talk unnecessarily, become extra emotional & stupid, start fighting without any reason.
• Advice of dentist. “Treat ur girl friend like a toothbrush. Don’t let any body else use it, and get a new one every three months.
• Beggar: Saab 12Rs do na coffee peeni hai.
Man: Lekin coffee to 6Rs ki hai?
Beggar: Par saab girlfrend bhi to hai.
Man: Bhikari hokar bhi GF banali.
Beggar: Na saab,GF ne Bhikari bana diya!
• What building has the most stories?
The Library.
• A teenage boy to his father: Here’s my report card and a list I’ve compiled of entrepreneurs who never finished their High School.
• Asmaan mai tum ho, samundar mai tum ho, zamin pe tum, hawa mai tum, jahan b dekho tum hi tum ho. DOMEX wali aunty thik kehti thi KITANU har jagah hote hain.
• Girl announced her engagement to her father.
Father: Does this fellow has any money?
Girl: Oh! Dad, U men r all alike, thats exactly what he asked me about u!
• Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!
• If time doesn’t wait for you, don’t worry! Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!